Warning: This post contains rude words, like "c**t". If you're not offended by such language, you can read the unedited post here.
Halfway into the Tour and it looks like Bradley Wiggins is going to win the thing. Of course, he could crash or crack, but I think those are the only two scenarios that are likely to derail his chances. And in my opinion, neither are very likely.
So, let's turn to a more important issue. Namely, is Bradley Wiggins a c**t?
A couple of days ago, he was asked what he had to say to those who felt it was impossible to win the Tour without the aid of drugs. He responded thus;
"They are just f*****g w*****s. I cannot be doing with people like that. It justifies their own bone-idleness because they can’t ever imagine applying themselves to anything in their lives. It’s easy for them to sit under a pseudonym on Twitter rather than get off their arses in their own life and apply themselves and work hard at something and achieve something, and that’s ultimately it. C***s!"
This seems a little rich from someone who spends his entire career on his arse. And bone-idleness? I'll have you know, Bradley, I've been writing this blog for over a year. Do you have any idea how much perseverance and determination that requires? No, probably not. C**t.
Then he looked at Vicenzo Nibali. At face value, this may not appear to constitute c**tiness but let's set the scene a little more. On yesterday's stage to Bellegarde-sur-Valserine, Nibali opened up a lead of over a minute. Of course, Bradley and his minions closed the move down without too much hassle. And what happened when they crossed the line? I'll let Nibali tell you; "Bradley turned and looked at me. If he wants to be a great champion, he needs to have a bit of respect for his adversaries. Sometimes turning around and looking into your face is an insult."
Now it could be that Nibbles is a little over-sensitive but I think it's at least as likely that Bradley is a c**t.
Then there's how he talks to people. Just the other day, he had this altercation with a cameraman (please note that I cannot edit this video and there are rude words in it);
Now let's have a look at what Wiggins thinks of himself;
"I’m not some sh*t rider who has come from nowhere. I’ve been three times Olympic champion on the track. I think people have to realise what kind of engine you need to win an Olympic gold medal as an Olympic pursuiter. I’ve been six times world champion, I’ve been fourth in the Tour de France, third in the Vuelta last year, it’s not like I’ve just come from nowhere. I’ve got an incredible pedigree behind me, junior world champion and an incredible rise through the ranks and so I don’t feel like I lost my cool, I just said what I think."
OK Bradley, you may be a good cyclist. But when you start using words like "engine" and "incredible pedigree" and "incredible rise" to describe yourself, I think you might be taking things a little too far. Sure, in Australia we have this thing called tall poppy syndrome and some may argue I'm suffering from that. But I'm not. I don't have a problem with greatness (I myself was recently described as the "best maths teacher ever" for example). What I do have a problem with is c***s. Arrogant, immodest (tautology? maybe) c***s who think they are somehow superior human beings.
Now, I know one shouldn't judge a book by its cover but let's throw caution to the wind and judge Bradley by his mug;
|Uhm, yeah, I think I'm a bit of a c**t.|
And this one;
|Whoa, Bradley let a smile through. Someone's going to get the sack.|
I reckon Bradley confused the era for the 1950s and confused his Pinarello for a Vespa. In his own mind, he looks like this;
With all those mirrors so that he can look at himself and ensure that he doesn't accidentally smile again. No such mistake on the front cover of last fortnight's L'Équipe where everyone is having a good time except old C***y and his friend Cav;
Now, I don't think you are a doper Bradley but with all this evidence, I do have a question for you;
What do you say to those people who suspect that you're a c**t?
And on that note, I think I'll have a lie down.